I Wish My Students Knew...

A week ago, the story of a third grade teacher's assignment to her students, in which she asked them to write about what they wish she knew about them, went viral.  Over the past couple of years innumerable op-ed pieces, political commentaries, and online debates have been written on the subject of effective teaching.  I do not wish to add verbose rhetoric to this cultural conversation, but feel compelled to give voice to the following thoughts...

I wish my students knew that I care far more about their developing character than their ability to catalog instruments into families.

I wish my students knew that it breaks my heart when I notice one of them snicker at innocently chosen words, that could be misconstrued as innuendo, because her smirk reveals an innocence that has been shattered.

I wish my students knew that I hate the testing schedule too.

I wish my students knew that don't assign partners because I revel in their disappointment at not getting to choose, but because I don't want him being the last one picked... again.

I wish my students knew that I purposefully sacrifice a totally in-control class for a slightly more chaotic one that allows them to move and dance around because I know how hard it is to sit still.

I wish my students knew the sadness that overtakes my heart (after the initial, selfish relief) when I hear that one of my particularly challenging students has moved because of the reminder that the instability of their home life is what has created those challenging behaviors.

I wish my students knew that their ability to look me in the eye and express their thoughts is more important than their ability to remember an acronym for EGBDF.

I wish my students knew that I intentionally put my dignity aside in order to show them that it's okay to not take yourself so seriously.

I wish my students knew that earning "brownie points" has nothing to do with actual brownies.

I wish my students knew that, yes, I did in fact notice the boy who has fallen asleep in the corner and I am okay with that.  Really.  We're just playing eighth notes on a maraca, and he didn't eat lunch today or sleep last night.

I wish my students knew that I lose sleep over how to respond when you pretend to choke yourself to get attention.  Or when you use the red marker under your nose to try to convince me that you were punched.  Or when you immediately react to another child accidentally bumping you by punching that child in the stomach.

I wish my students knew that I lose sleep over these things because I legitimately worry that you are going to be arrested by the time you are in middle school due to the violent patterns you are setting for yourself now.  I lose sleep because I am certain that you are setting yourself on this kind of path because this type of violence is normal in your life.

I wish my students knew that I pray for them on my drive to work.

I wish my students knew that I have a "Smile File" that I keep their precious notes (even if I can't read them) and pictures in and these things touch my soul.

I wish that my students knew that yes, of course, it is always okay for you to give me a hug.  Always.

I wish that my students knew that I loathe the myriad of detrimental effects to their generation caused by my generation's obsession with the self-esteem movement.

I wish that my students knew that I love them too much to affirm their distracting and horrendous behavior choices by giving them the attention they crave.  Even though it drives me up the wall.

I wish my students knew that I hate the phrase "Do I have to sit next to her?"

I wish that my students knew that their bodies are more resilient than they think and a hangnail is not a legitimate reason to need to visit the nurse or have a screaming fit.

I wish my students knew that my ultimate goal is not that they can match pitch, keep a steady beat, define "forte," locate a time signature, show me the correct solfege hand signs, or hold a mallet correctly because in a few years, they might not even remember me or anything they did in their elementary school music class.  My goal is that they love music.  That it becomes part of them.  That they want to pursue it on their own.  That they enjoy it.

I wish my students knew that I care about them having a quality education, but I also want them to enjoy being kids with active, creative imaginations.

I wish my students knew that I don't teach primarily because I love music, but because I love them.

Poking and Prodding and Plodding Along with Peter

Bursts of encouraging mental energy often accompany my study of scripture, and I came across this gem this morning:

Prepare your minds for action, and being sober-minded, set your hope fully on the grace that will be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ.   -1 Peter 1:13

(Incidentally, before even cracking the Good Book open, I prayed "God, help me love you better with my mind and thoughts."  This is was the first verse He answered with.  Talk about an instantly-gratified prayer!)

Here's what I love about this.  "Prepare your minds for action" means that faithfully hoping in Christ is neither mindless nor passive.  It isn't for the weak or simple-minded.   It doesn't casually saunter or plod along.  It doesn't call for dull doormats.  Rather, we are called to wake up, to pursue clarity of thought, to ask questions, to wrestle with scriptural claims, to contemplate, to reason, to deduce, to really think!  On the basis of a sober, actively-engaged mind, only then can we fully trust that grace and revelation of Christ.  

Blind acceptance of a truth waivers when doubts and trials come along.  Passive faith drowns in watered-down theology.  The Creator who formed an ordered, logical universe that can be understood by rational minds invites us to use that cerebrum of ours to consider and examine and engage with and poke and prod and ask deep questions of the Words He has given us.

And-- may I just say?-- I love that.

Solving for the Value of X, where X = [your name]

"Yeah, well, teachers get paid way too much."

Let me pause here by disclosing that this is not about teachers' salaries.  Okay, moving on.

This past weekend, as I was speaking with two individuals on a subject totally unrelated to salaries or teachers, that comment worked itself into the conversation.  In retrospect, I'm not even sure how.  It was there, and then it was gone, and the topic was no more.

We all make off-handed comments from time to time without realizing how they might effect someone else.  Ingrained in those comments are assertions of our own values, and yet, so often we express ourselves in such a way that implies them to be indisputable fact.
   "Big business owners are corrupt, money-driven charlatans."
   "You're a stay-at-home mom?  Man, that must be nice."
   "It's obscene how much NFL players make!"
   "[insert name of a President] is the worst thing in history to happen to this country."

Skimming under the surface in each of those comments is a set of values, and those values are influenced by upbringing, personal experiences, religious beliefs, culture, interests, and general worldview.  A friend taking graduate classes for counseling recently described an activity one of her courses required that involved ranking 15 professions in order of importance.  This list included everything from doctor to social worker to professional athlete.  The point of the exercise was to reveal where your values lie and hint to where you may tend to unconsciously ascribe more or less worth to someone based on what they do.  She then went on to talk about how differently her children and classmates ranked these jobs and the conversations that ensued about values.

Making statements akin to "Teachers get paid way too much" speaks volumes more about your personal values than a budgetary analysis of tax dollars.  Spoken to a teacher whose husband also happens to be a teacher, it shouts loud and clear, "I do not feel you are worth your salary."  Asserting that business owners are corrupt discounts many who are passionate about creating jobs to better people's lives as far as it depends on them.  Implying that full-time care of one's own children is a less worthwhile role than full-time caring for others' children displays devalues a practice that has been commonplace for as long as people have walked the Earth.  Failing to consider the economic business generated by idolization of wildly successful star athletes (another topic for another time) disregards a primary reason for those massive contracts.  And really?  One politician serving in a system of checks and balances for a few years is the worst thing to happen to the country in history?  Check your History books again.

Nothing here is Earth-shattering.  Although everyone can recognize how differently we are wired, what is often missed is the beauty in those differences.  We need those who can string series of pitches and rhythms together cohesively from tension to release and resolution to make our ears dance with delight.  We need those who can skillfully erect sturdy walls that contain warmth and sound and do not crumble with each annual arrival of hurricane season.  We need intelligent minds who have the ability to inspire others to action to better the quality of the lives around them.  And if we were all composers or carpenters or public speakers, we would all severely suffer.  There is worth in every person and some degree of value in every position.  I leave you with this:

For the body does not consist of one member but of many. If the foot should say, “Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body,” that would not make it any less a part of the body. And if the ear should say, “Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body,” that would not make it any less a part of the body. If the whole body were an eye, where would be the sense of hearing? If the whole body were an ear, where would be the sense of smell? But as it is, God arranged the members in the body, each one of them, as he chose. If all were a single member, where would the body be? As it is, there are many parts, yet one body.
The eye cannot say to the hand, “I have no need of you,” nor again the head to the feet, “I have no need of you.” On the contrary, the parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable... God has so composed the body, giving greater honor to the part that lacked it, that there may be no division in the body, but that the members may have the same care for one another.  (1 Corinthians 12:15-25)

Why I Love Photography

I can pinpoint exactly when I first fell in love with photography.  It took exactly two events to turn my indifference into total obsession. Event number one happened in the late fall of 2008 during a First Friday with some friends in Lancaster.  We were meandering through several of the coffee shops and art galleries in the city when we came to one that hosted a wall filled with black and white photos featuring a young girl holding a red umbrella.  Immediately, your eyes were drawn to the only colored portion of the picture, but with each framed photograph, once you were able to move your eyes to all that surrounded it, the real story was told.

The second event was a visit to the Smithsonian with a friend several months later.  We were walking through an exhibit of photo winners displayed in the Museum of Natural History and BAM! I was hooked.  These were National Geographic-quality pictures but printed on enormous canvases.  Those brief moments in time that will never again take place in exactly the same way told a story.  The flawless editing drew you into the artist's world and allowed the subjects to jump out at you.

I have realized that what I love most about photography is that it reveals reality.  I can appreciate a painter's artistic ability to recreate or a sculptor's craftiness to get 3-D proportions perfectly, but in my mind, nothing can surpass the beauty of what already exists.  In a perpetually moving world, one excellent photograph can allow you to revel in the artistry of one tiny moment in time.

As I've attempted to hone my still incredibly amateurish skills of photographing, this passion has been fueled by the focus that capturing these moments requires.  Really looking at a subject- studying it from various angles, analyzing how the light reflects off of and around it, seeing the depth of perspective of everything around it- has given me a greater appreciation for the world around me than I ever had before.  Editing encompasses this on an even deeper level as I work to bring out certain colors or bring something in or out of focus.

I have learned to really look around.  Beauty is literally everywhere, from angles formed in the distant horizon to the veins of a leaf floating to the ground by your face.  Stopping to actually focus on it, whether in the moment or with a photograph's help, is so worth the time.

Cheapskate

I am a self-proclaimed cheapskate.  In areas where I have primary jurisdiction over spending money, I do what I can to not pay more than is necessary for things.  I had a three-minute soul search earlier this week over whether to purchase a shirt that was 70% off the regular price at Kohl's, plus an additional 20%.  I really liked the shirt, but it was $9.  Knowing I could probably find similar item for  less at Goodwill made me think twice... And thrice... And whatever comes after thrice.  (I wound up getting it, and no, have not looked back since).  Being a good steward of money is important to me, but so is my time.  Extreme couponing and traveling to a grocery store just for one item that is a great price isn't worth the trade off.

Having said that, I've picked up several household and food-related tips that save us money and time (in the long run).  I'm aware that there are limitless websites that contain similar ideas.

1- The freezer is your friend.  When they are in season, I find a farmers market or pick-your-own place, get a buku of stuff, peel, chop, bag, and freeze.  (Many friends who swear by canning because of the threat of power failures and the potential to lose everything.  What can I say?  I like living dangerously).  This year, I did peaches, raspberries (red and purple), blueberries, blackberries, peaches (diced and pie filling) peppers (bell and various hot), tomatoes, pumpkin, apples (in the form of applesauce, pie filling, and apple butter) and onions.  The only painful one is onions, but grab a candle, crackers, tissues, chemistry goggles, or whatever helps you get through a big bag of tear-inducing veggies.  I've got all I need for the year and got it at low prices.  It's ready to use and is still fresh-tasting once thawed.

2- Laundry detergent that doesn't come with a soft, high-voiced, annoying bear.  It's a ton cheaper without loads of unpronounceable chemicals and blue dye #3.14.  The one I've found that I love uses water, washing soda, borax, and bar soap.

3- Ditch the deoderant.  There are tons of homemade deodorant recipes out there but I've found that using a dusting of baking soda lasts longer than store-bought chemical-sweat-suppressors.  I was a bit leery at first, but after a day, I was totally convinced.  Again, waaaay cheaper.

Lastly, this isn't exactly a tip, but is worth every second you spend peeling and coring: Goodness, gracious, great balls of apple butter, try this immediately: http://www.mybakingaddiction.com/crock-pot-slow-cooker-apple-butter-recipe/